The Two Trees

About 15 years ago, I had a disagreement with one of my best friends in ministry. The disagreement got a little out of hand and he eventually lashed out and yelled at me! I couldn’t believe it! But, I pushed his buttons and he let me have it!

My mom used to say, I’m a piece of work, and that I could make a priest cuss! Ha!

I’d like to say, my buddy and I quickly worked through the issue in a healthy Biblical way, but, my heart was sent for a loop. And I describe my response this way; I ran.

That disagreement and the way my buddy responded allowed a deep wound to surface, and an agreement I had made years ago, to a similar nasty circumstance in college.

My response to the blow up even concerned my wife. And she is as solid as a rock, and very level headed. So, when she spoke up, we decided I should seek some wisdom from a trusted counselor, to pray and talk through why “I ran.”

Before this issue, the response that surfaced, had never shown its ugly head before. So, I knew I had to do some “heart” work and get to the bottom of things.

So, I called and met with who I call my “heart paramedic.” And he was super skilled at getting to the core of what was ailing me.

In the end, the counseling and restoration my counselor led me to was incredible. We identified the past wound, we also identified the psychological and spiritual messages I received from that wound and then named the agreements I had made to the false messages I had made agreements to.

This exercise was fantastic! It brought deep clarity to my wounded heart, and we invited Jesus into the wound to heal it! It was an amazing experience.

From all this “heart” work, my counselor had me draw two trees. One tree was the tree of control. The other tree was the tree of freedom.

A tree has roots, a trunk and fruit or leaves.

So, the tree of controls roots were named. The roots fed the trunk. The trunk was named “control” and several of the trees fruit of me living my life from the center of control were named.

I then did the same exercise for the tree of freedom!

I still have this drawing to this day, and when I rummage through old journals and things, I look at these two trees God had me draw.

I’ve concluded over the years, that I can’t control one darn thing! Except…walking with God.

God has deeply shown me freedom and what the fruit of a life lived from the lens of freedom can do in a mans life.

I have since then attempted to live my life from the tree of freedom. And the peace that has come from this decision has been amazing.

So, the two trees, which tree are you living from? Are there wounds you have taken that need identified and prayed through? I pray you find a “heart paramedic” to help you pray through and heal the broken areas of your heart.

I called my mom and told her the priest’s don’t have anything to worry about anymore! She wasn’t convinced!

Matt